To Whom It May Concern,
10 days after hysterctomy, I have only one major regret. A regret that I believe many women have but are afraid to share publically. I am not ashamed to say that I have failed my body.
I imagined my life after hysterectomy being a bit painful for a few days (2-3) then back to normal. I thought, the strong business woman that I am, that I would be just fine to be back working within a few days to a week. I would put the pain pills away, get back at my desk and while slower for a few days, I would be back to normal in no time.
I was wrong. I was 100% wrong. I was stupid. I was prideful. I was just downright idiotic believing that I was better than the stereotype and could bounce right back. I thought that since I really bounced back fast after my back surgery last year, this would be no big deal. A day or two of rest and pain meds, then back to work on day 3 or 4. Yeah, I tried that, and here I am on day 10 pretty miserable.
I do feel better. I do not regret this surgery at all. In fact, I can’t even say it is tough to recover from. I just have to admit that I regret trying to recover too fast. I regret not caring for my body better. I simply tried to speed up a natural process to suit my “needs”. Folks, it doesn’t work that way.
After Hysterectomy I Regret Not Caring For My Body Better
I am discovering that I truly did move and bend and twist and overdo it a lot the first week. On day 10, I am laying here in bed fighting the tears because I know I have to take a pain pill to just be able to relax. I didn’t imagine this simple “outpatient” surgery could leave me so completely drained. Let alone hurting so deeply for so long. On day 3 I felt a bit of a tug around my incisions but otherwise felt pretty “normal”. I really thought the pain was gone and I was good to go. So, I got to work. I did some client work. I worked on some things for this site. I stood and helped my Beau make soup. I lounged a lot, but I wasn’t as slow or careful as I should have been, and now here I am back to the point of being in pain when the pain should be gone.
No, this isn’t the worst pain I have ever felt, but it is the most exhausting thing I have ever undergone. I hurt. A deep ache in my abdomen that is expected and I can handle with some ibuprofen or on the worst days/times a pain pill. My 3 incisions from surgery are mostly healed. They itch, as is normal in healing, but otherwise are not a problem. It’s just that my body is kind of in shock. This isn’t just a little surgery. Just because it was outpatient for me, doesn’t mean it is just a minor thing. Frankly, I see why so many doctors have been making my friends who are going through this stay 24-48 hours in the hospital. Your body has a lot of healing to do after hysterectomy. A lot. Seriously, if you take nothing else from this – remember that your body has to heal inside – not just outside.
Not only did I have surgery, I had organs removed from my body. She removed organs that control my hormones. Hormones that affect my emotions, my physical reactions to many things, my temperature, my ability to burn fat, the way my hair grows, just so many pieces of who I am. She removed my way of giving life to another human being. She removed the last piece of my sons from my body. For me, knowing that I no longer hold the place I carried my sons was a lot more emotional than I expected. She removed the entrance to my womb and sewed my body back together to create a seal that will keep my bowels and bladder inside where they should be instead of prolapsed out of my vagina. Yes, it’s a yucky thing to think of but it can happen. She, with the skill of her hands, removed something that had turned bad inside my body and then sewed me back together in a way that will leave me whole and healthy.
After hysterectomy, I realize that when you remove organs, your body has to adjust to them not being there. It’s not like clipping a fingernail or cutting your hair. This is, still, no matter how short your hospital stay, a majorly invasive surgery. Not only does my body have to adjust to the loss of part of what makes it me, it has to recover from the effects of the anesthetic used. It has to overcome the pain, fight off infection, and begin the process of healing and letting those sutures stay put to keep everything in place.
My doctor warned me. She told me, as I sat across from her signing the papers to allow her to take my uterus, ovaries, and cervix in hopes of a better and healthier life in the long run, she told me that I was to be a total couch potato that slept, took short walks, ate healthy foods, and slept some more for the first two weeks. She told me, that under no circumstances was I to go back to work before my post-op appointment at one month after surgery. I explained that I worked from home, online and it wasn’t like a regular outside the home job. She laughed and said, “Yes it is. Your body doesn’t know the difference between an office or your couch”.
She was right. So was my Beau. So was my mother-in-law. So was my Sister.
I didn’t expect this to be something that knocked me down for a few weeks, but it has. I believe that it is a surgery that is not tough to recover from if you follow directions and take things easy. That means, don’t be like me. Don’t overdo it. Don’t try to be super independent. Don’t act like you are better than others and can just overcome with the snap of your fingers.
Right now, I am laying in bed writing this. I feel the lull of the pain pill I took shortly before I begin writing clouding my brain. I know, that while I have clients I owe work to, my own site in need of work, and ultimately bills to pay, I am likely going to be asleep within the hour. Doing what I should have been doing the last 10 days. Letting my body heal properly after hysterectomy. So I can spend more days laughing, smiling and taking selfies with the Wee Child.
If you find yourself faced with choosing to have a hysterectomy, don’t hesitate to do so for you health. It is a great thing, and it can be easy to recover from. However, don’t follow my initial example. Do what your doctor says. Take it easy. Rest. Allow your body to heal after hysterectomy surgery.
lenajeanne says
great post cousin and totally agree. Get better soon!
Kate says
Thank you. At 7 days out, I mailed a package, returned some clothes to the mall, and almost made it through the grocery store when the room started to spin. I managed to get the food to the car and have others unpack it, but I have been paying for this at 10 days and now I am out of Percocet and discovered the backup pain meds (just a heavy dose of Ibprofen) makes my blood pressure spike and makes me start to black out if I am not lying down. Was expecting to be working out in the gym by now.
Katie says
Oh no! The gym is a long way away. Definitely follow what your doctor says and allow your body to heal!
Sparkle says
I’m on day ten. Today was my first day out. I drove. I left about 1:00 and didn’t back to about 5:00. I did a lot of waiting, which included sitting. I had chills, but I was hot. I wasn’t in pain. I moved very slow. I had people open the door for me. I will see how I feel in the morning. So, ready for the gym. I’m not going till I’m ready 🤕
Becky says
Thank you for this article. I am day 5 and feeling so frustrated that I’m still in pain and have to keep asking my kids and boyfriend to do everything. Started working some on day 3 but feel worse now than I did right after.
jan says
im on the list here in the uk to have mine done u words have brought me two tears but i will take your advice and rest
Connie Wade says
Connie Wade
I am on day 6 and keep questioning why I am not feeling better. I read your article and I feel much better now about how I am feeling. I did work a few hours today from home and started feeling dizzy. It’s so hard to just rest when you know there are things to be done. I guess that is just the female inside us. Thank you for this. I will definitely follow it!
Tracey says
Hello,
I read your post 4 days after my hysterectomy. It made sense, I’m following Dr. Orders as well. No major house work, don’t lift anything more than 5lbs. Take it easy, ride the couch. 2nd week in, feeling better, I can do a small load of laundry,one piece at a time. Dishwasher same thing, go slow one dish at a time. The bathroom is messy, if I just take my time go slow, not strain I can clean. Day 10 Hubby and I go to Costco. He pushes the cart, I try not to grab heavy stuff, a box of grapes, not really heavy. Walked around stood in line, really nothing major. Day 11 woke up, feeling more tender than I have, go pee and now I’m bleeding. WTF! I really didn’t think what I was doing was at all strenuous, because my body is used to 10 times more than what I have been doing and I still over did it. So mad cause I read this post early, and I didn’t listen. I am a stubborn person and I thought I was really following orders. Ha! After a hysterectomy the couch should really be your only friend for at least 6 to 8 weeks as per what your Dr. Says. I am responding to this post because the author is right, we don’t really listen, we tend to think that we do, and then we really don’t relay our experience. Thank you for this post. I’m sorry I didn’t take it seriously when I first read it. Now I am too paying for it.
We need to listen to our bodies and obey. I hope recovery for you has been better. Thinking of you now. Take good care.
Tracey
Katie says
Thank you for sharing your story Tracey! I know I scoffed at what they said. I also saw other women going back to work so fast after hysterectomy and thought I was just weak. The reality is, our bodies know we need this time and rest. I hope your recovery continues to improve!
cheryl says
Thank both of you for your post and response. Let me start by sayin im a nurse so I really do know what I Should do just dont always do that.I’m post-op day 10 had a few set backs post-op fever and developed inflammation but the last 2 days not temp and felt good so carried some trash out and picked up my grand babies that I’ve missed being able to pick up and rock. Well today woke up with more pain and started spotting so today is going to be a day of laying on the couch doing nothing.
Donna says
HI today is my day 10 and i had a complete hysterectomy including omentum thru stomach. I have also learned to stop and just rest. Good luck hun.
Carol says
I just went through mine almost two weeks ago and I can relate. I have to admit that I have been 90% obedient to doctor’s instructions but the desire to go back to normal made force my husband to take my to a small supermarket….bang! The incisions started to hurt by the time we got to the register. What I couldn’t comprehend was the reason behind my back pain. It was so intense that reminded me of the day I was giving birth. I didn’t lift anything, I just walked around telling my husband what to put in the cart!!! Now, I’ve been having pain for three days, and that is affecting my emotions because I really want to feel better, but all I want to do now is cry ?
Katie says
I had back pain as well after surgery. I believe the additional stress on your back muscles since your abdominal wall has been disturbed may be a part of it. Definitely, watch it and call your doctor if it persists. Feel free to email me if you need to chat! [email protected]
Tracey says
I am so thankful i found this, ive been googling to find out if i should be feeling better 10 days after laprascopic hysterectomy. I am feeling less pain but i am still exhausted i feel alot of pressure in my abdomen still have a back ache, i went to the shops yesterday with my daughter and i ended up in alot of pain after that. My husband has been great he has done everything for me and i feel guilty which then turns to sadness i feel i should be doing more so i try to push myself then suffer the consequences after. I just dont want to feel this way. I know its going to take time to heal and after reading everyones posts i now realise i am going through a normal recovery.
Thankyou to all for sharing.
Claire Reid says
Hi, I am 8 days post OP and I am so bored but confused. This is my 7th gynaecologist op and I feel a lot better than I have done in the past but I am finding nights terribly. Sleeping on my back is horrid, yet sleeping on my side with a pillow is also uncomfortable as I feel gravity taking its toll.
I find all the information online so vague about recovery. I am a Pilates Instructor and I fend my posture changing as I try to protect my tummy area. They physio told me 12 weeks before I can demo in class. I am still in shock about this and despite people telling me to rest I am just finding it so hard. I am not used to sitting around, I have 2 young children who are very active and watching and missing their activities is hard going.
I was wondering if anyone else can tell me what exercises they were told to from 1 to 2 weeks apart from pelvic floor exercises. I don’t want to overdo it, but when is safe to start engaging the core?
Thanks and I hope you are properly recovering post op?
Claire
Katrina says
Wow!!!! amazing that we women have to experience such things, whatever our age. I just had everything removed, at 66 and recently got married after so many years alone. Now what…well, my message would be to honor your body and be in touch with each emotion, internal feelings that for sure are telling us something. We must be sensitive and listen…it will take care of us if we take care of it.
Rona says
Thank you for this reality check. This is so accurate Katie. I needed to read this. Going to take better care of myself starting now…Good night! Will start with getting the rest I need. Instead of obsessing over other women’s experiences, I am going to focus on my own.
Brenda says
It’s 0300 and I just read your blog. I needed to read this. I am four days post surgery. I felt angry most of the day due to clients calling, employees with questions, etc. I felt “good enough” to answer questions and get work done. I’m here in the wee morning feeling poorly and regretting my decisions of the day.
I am going to honor my body! I’m going to give my body the time it deserves to heal.
Thank you for posting-
Amanda says
Hey! I just turned 35 and just had a robotic hysterectomy seven days ago. I just wanted to say your post was a super helpful reality check as I too have felt “wimpy” for laying around and have been tempted to do more than I should. Alright, not just tempted – I HAVE done more than I should. A life of chronic health problems and chronic pain has instilled in me a “cowgirl up” and “push through it” mentality – one that’s been more deeply engrained than I realized. Your post and all the comments have reinforced the messages I’ve been getting from my mom and doctors – rest, rest, rest. Me and Netflix have something serious going right now, and I guess it’s not a bad thing! Thanks for your candor and willingness to share. It’s given me peace about my own recovery process.
Nic says
So glad others have these thoughts. 5 days still in hospital fighting an infection, back pain on and off , why did I do this. I know I need to move forward and love and cherish my body and be positive. Its like winter wanting spring.
Lynne says
Just had laproscopic hysterectomy been feeling fine until today 7 days in feeling nausea so decided to make sofa my best friend instead of trying to make myself get better quicker.
Katie says
Rest as much as possible! Get well quickly!
Karen says
I am at day 6 after robotic surgery. Spent 1 night in hospital. Went home at 4pm the following day. Felt pretty good. Asked my husband to care for me for 7 days. No conflict, nor discussing kid issues. On day 3 he started in talking about how our oldest son hadn’t done this or that. I engaged in yelling match. After 3 days time I ended up staying at a friend’s house. I’m now in a bad place, pain and fatigue. My message is make sure you are in a supportive, peaceful environment in order to heal physically and emotionally. Have tears as I’m write this.
Katie says
I am so very sorry you are in a bad place Karen. You will be in my thoughts over the coming days and weeks. Please put yourself first. Always.
Dawn says
Thank you for your post! I wish I would have read it 7 days ago!! I have also overdone it and didn’t listen to everyone’s advice and I was doing good. Only a pain pill in late morning and maybe one late evening. Now I am hoping I have enough to last me as I went shopping today and feel as if my insides are coming out!!
Cheryl says
Thank you so much for posting this and everyone for your comments. I’m only five days in and so frustrated and impatient. This is just what I needed to read to help me do what I need to do…whether I like it or not.
Mary says
Thank you for writing this. 1 week Post-Op and searching for a “guide” on how I should be feeling. I cried through the whole article. We women are so harsh to ourselves. I posted your link on my fb page and sent it to my entire family to read— just to validate myself and my recovery. At times I just start shaking/shivering even though I’m not cold, I had said that I thought my body was in shock over losing parts. Felt good when I read your words to that effect. THANK YOU
Katie says
Oh Mary, take care of yourself!! It is so hard, and yes, we are so hard on ourselves. I hope the rest of your recovery is easier.
Kathy says
So glad I found this site. I am 6 days since hysterectomy and bladder sling surgery. I really thought I’d be up and out that feeling this tired was because I’m a wimp. Now I know it’s normal. I’ll just take my time to heal. Thank you everyone!
Kate C says
I thought I was crazy because I have also been searching post op hysterectomy. There is not much out there for abdominal hysterectomy. Almost everything I find is vaginal or laparoscopic. On the outside I look normal. Clean clothes on hair washed and blown dry. Two matching shoes. Ive even managed to drive to the post office. However, 16 days post total abdominal hysterectomy Im not sure how i should feel. Some days I feel great then as the day goes on I am so tired. To my family I look like good old mom, so I do my duties and cook dinner and throw in wash or make the bed, pull the weeds, empty the trash. I don”t really know what I should be doing. But, I do know that at the end of the day I am tired and in pain. I only take tylenol or motrin but the nagging pain is there. Am I an imposter? Should I just stay on the sofa? I know what I need to avoid doing, but I am so tired of waiting for someone else to do it. If only I could get past the tiredness
Kelly says
THANK YOU ALL!! THIS HAS BEEN AN EYE OPENER AN SO VERY HELPFUL IN SO MANY WAYS! LOVE AND HEALING TO ALL! 🙂
Shanda says
6 days post op of my lapo hysterectomy. I have been trying to take it easy. I am bored out of my mind and I feel like a burden to my husband. He of course doesn’t feel that way, but I have always been strong and independent. We have 3 dogs and they are 1,8 and 14. I let them out as my “excersize”. I also admit to doing 2 load’s of laundry and dishes…….. I can’t seem to help it. I have read people’s posts and I am scared to death I am hurting myself. I don’t know why it is so hard to give myself some time to heal correctly.
Suzette Miranda says
I had an abdominal hysterectomy in Aug. 1992. I have a big smiley face along my abdomen. A couple of months after i was feeling good and saw a line of ants going along the outside entrance of my house. I like watching ants and seeing where they go. I decided to bend over or squat down to see where they go and i felt a real bad pain. I had pulled some of my stitches. I had to go back to the hospital to fix it. I wanted to get well and return to normal too, and that day i learned i cannot always do what i want to when i have surgery. I am older now and have had other kinds of surgeries and i make sure i do not overdo it. I enjoyed reading everyone’s words.
Sharon says
Day 5 after abdominal hysterectomy and dr Said he has took everything. Was in horrendous pain before 21 fibroids different sizes 2 biggest 7 cms each.ovarian cysts also.
Was petrified to have op but knew it was urgent on day 5 after op so uncomfortable and have been doing as I’m told.finding it painful just to turn over when lay down or sit up.
TOday is going to be a day In bed And painkillers.
Still early days they have said 6-8 weeks recovery. Take care all
Amber says
I just found this, 6 days post op, and I needed it bad. Today is day 1 with my husband back to work, with three kids who want there momma, and I’m hurting. The most I’ve hurt yet. And it isn’t unbearable, but it is there. I’m not super woman. Thank you for reminding me.
Lee says
5th week after abdominal hysterectomy and staying in bed most of the time. Reading, netflix and surfing. I cook once in a while and do some walking. I feel that my internal organs are adjusting filling in the empty space. There’s just a bit pain on end of the suture but its tolerable. I stopped taking pain relievers on the 8th day. Hoping to travel in 2 weeks time. Thanks Katie for posting. We really should listen to what our body needs. Recover & heal well everyone=)
Mary says
Hi, Day 9 after vagina hysterectomy & vaginal prolapse. Great to read all of the posts, & my heart has gone out to the other writers as i feel very lucky, but as i am someone as well who also thinks that i can do more than i probably should, it was great to come across this site. I was not really given thorough advise from the hospital, even when i was asking questions on do’s & do not’s!! As i am a fit person of 59 who enjoys long walks, i took to getting out walking from day 3, only around the local cemetery, but for about 45mins, then doing a shorter walk later in the day. Is this too much i ask myself?! I was aware that i moved on the settee 5days ago, & it caused me to have a painful strange sensation on my left side that shot up my front. I now have a dull ache & get a sharp pain periodically on my left side, that does make me call out at times, (even when i was asleep in bed) I am not a wuss, have not needed painkillers since day 7, felt tired but not exhausted, so the uncertainty of have i just overdone things,(as so many others have done) & see it things settle with rest, or could i have done some internal damage to stitches. All i can say is thank goodness for the internet & thank you. Get well soon everyone.
Wendi Cowne says
9 days post hysto and bladder mesh combo, here.
I feel like a hundred dollars. I’ve managed to do so much. Mostly just uncomfortable, not exactly painful. Unless I attempt rotate my hip flexor further than 35 degrees on either side, then I’m frozen and unable to move for a hot minute. I managed to only take four pain pills since being discharged from the hospital.
I’ve been walking, kneeling, bending, climbing stairs, situating and re-situating, and re-situating, repeat. Making myself lunch and breakfasts. Changing diapers while on my knees, toddler on couch or having him climb up onto our bed for changes. I feel like I could do so much more.
Should I be feeling this great, this soon? It seems as though my story doesn’t exactly fit others thus far.
Being down is hard. Watching everyone do all of your work (hopefully). Is hard. Someone else putting your babe to bed because you cannot, and he’s screaming your name…is hard.
Hang in there, ladies.
Cathy says
I am 14 days post surgery I had laparoscopic hysterectomy. I did take it easy the first week and a half, I thought today that I could drive 50 miles and go to the grocery store. Boy am I paying for it now. I can barely move tonight I’ve got hip pain lower abdominal pain, and my back is hurting. Like most of you I figured I would be back up and rolling within two weeks. Not happening! I am going to have to listen and really take it easy for another couple of weeks. I’m just hoping I haven’t messed anything up or delayed my recovery by doing too much today.
Thank you to all of you that have shared about your recovery and set backs. it has helped tremendously reading what all y’all have gone through with this surgery as well. I am self employed, too, it is so hard to cut it off!
Deborah says
Wow…I am reading this as I am planning my surgery. This is the first site I have come across with an honest account of what this is all going to be like! I have pre-op appointments in the coming weeks. On the 17th I will have the date of my surgery. I have had issues in my uterus since I was 23 and I am now 46. Since my last pelvic ultrasound came back with all symptoms of uterine or onset of uterine cancer, I opted to have a hysterectomy. No more tests, no more poking and prodding…just take it out.
However, reading the posts, I too, am guilty of being Superwoman. I work full-time, teach part-time AND I am corporate trainer/speaker. I was hoping to be able to at least go back to teaching for a few hours 2 days a week. Teaching is my passion and the one job I truly care about…at the moment, I am hoping for the best…I don’t normally sit while teaching but…I can at least do that. Right??
I am truly nervous about recovery because I am super active and just want to get back to normal. Am I being unrealistic? Too optimistic? Sheesh…I am now making lists and purchasing the things I need at home and arranging for help the first 2 weeks…what else do I need to know? My doctor already told me, bed rest for the first 2 weeks and I almost died!!!
Anne de Jager says
Can recomend “Hystersisters” site on Pinterest. Very helpful advice for pre-op and post op. Am 6 weeks post op after TAH plus ovaries. 6 to 12 months for internal healing ! Your surgeon has done his best for you now you have a responsibility to do your best for your recovery. All the best.
Tamar says
Day 13 post surgery…sounds like I am not the only person that thinks and feels that they are Wonderwoman. I don’t do well with pain pills, so I stopped them the day after I got home and managed with ice packs and an ibuprofen here and there. I have a really high pain threshhold, which is great, yet not so great in situations such as these as you will soon read.
As an EXTREMELY active woman, my biggest fear with having this surgery was not being able to lift weights and go to the rock climbing gym. Soooooo…. day 8 I decided to get ou and start moving, so I went out for a short hike. Feeling great the next day, I walked on the treadmill at the gym for an hour, day 10 I decided on a more rigorous and much longer hike, feeling fantastic, day 11 I opted to push myself a bit and went for a fast pace fairly strenuous uphill hike. Day 12 and 13 I feel like my insides are going to fall out!
Everyone, especially my mother, keeps telling me to slow it down, but I have always prided myself on my physical capabilities…I was NOT going to let this slow me down… well, the laugh in only on me. Last night, I succomed to the nasty pain pills that make me nauseous as shit and today it is back to ice packs and ibuprofen. My best friend took it upon herself to spend the night because she wanted to make sure I did NOTHING but lay on the sofa and eat loads of junk food with her, I LOVE her for that! I have my follow up Wed and promised everyone that I would not do anymore hiking until then!
Thanks for sharing your stories… hearing everyone else struggle has helped me tremendously
Lisa says
I loved your post.
I’m 3 weeks today. I’ve sat reading it with tears running down my face. Obviously, in the emotional hormone stage.
Thanks for sharing, a big help 😊
Bobbi Toner says
I not only had a hysterectomy but vaginal reconstruction, a cystocele, rectocele and I thought three months was a joke. I am 4 1/2 weeks out and I can understand why I need to “take it easy”. As soon as I do too much, I can feel great discomfort. I try not to lift anything over 5 pounds and also no housework. If I drive too far or walk to much (which I often do) I am so uncomfortable. So if the Doctor tells you to take it easy, it’s wise to follow the orders. I am learning to take it easy. Which is very hard for me. I can’t even sit on a hard surface for any amount of time.
Jenn says
I am day 11 after TLH. Yesterday I rode in the car about two hours away, shopped for about and hour and travelled back. I was tired and felt a little pressure from walking for that amount of time but felt okay going lo bed. I woke up in the middle of the night with pain and started spotting. I had not had any spotting or bleeding until now. My question is for those who have overdone it, how long after you had a set back did you start feeling better again?? Also have to say for something that is such a major thing and so many of you saying even after months you had an issue or two why the doctors act like it is not a big deal and encourage you that in a couple of weeks you will be able to return to normal activities??? I am scared to death that I will not be able to have sex for months. I was told before surgery it would be about 6 weeks but now I am not so sure that is sufficient. So discouraged as I thought I could be back at the gym in 3 weeks. From reading and what I am experiencing today I am not sure about any of it.
Katie says
I was back to normal feeling within 1 month, but still had bouts of exhaustion for a few months – it wasn’t daily, but if I had a longer or harder day, I would feel tired faster than “normal”. I was able to easily have sex at 6 weeks with no complications. Just be prepared with lubrication and go slow at first.